WRITER

"Fresh & sharp!"
Los Angeles Times


"Did I Wake You?"

is Beth's critically-acclaimed book of modern haiku


Read her column in LA Yoga:


Beth of Both Worlds (May Issue)

I used to be a total yoga snob. So when one of my yoga-friends reappeared in our world-class class and confessed she'd been 'doing yoga at the gym', I thought, 'Gym Yoga?! I would never do gym yoga!' She was back now, because she'd been injured. Sure, gym yoga! Only a fool would do gym yoga!

Then my living situation changed and I couldn't make it to my world-class class five times a week. Or even four. Or sometimes even once. I did everything I could. I rushed away from things before they had ended, I over extended, I pretended. Basically, I fought the flow that I had worked so hard to learn in my practice.

When I did get to class, my yoga-friends would ask where I'd been.

"Practicing at home," I would say. I could see that pitying 'I would never give up these classes' look in their eyes.

"Isn't it lonely," they would ask.

"Oh no," I would say. But it was lonely. Yes, I tried downloads and CDs. I embraced the joy of listening to my own body and being my own teacher. Still, lonely.

In desperation I bought one of those day-glo rave hoola hoops because they were pitching hooping as a complementary practice to yoga. The only thing was, I wasn't actually practicing enough yoga for it to be a compliment to!

I made it to my world-class class one day but I couldn't even enjoy it. "Are you okay," my teacher asked.

"I feel my practice slipping away," I said.

"It's just asana. You're living your yoga."

"That's sweet," I said, and I started to cry.

I decided to join a gym because this way I'd be in shape to practice when I could get to class. And because there is one two minutes from my house. It's called World Gym. If there was any word that could make we want to join a gym it might be world.

As long as I'm there, I check out the yoga. And to my shock I found a teacher I really liked. Now, of course, I'm happily practicing 'gym yoga' three times a week. Never say never. Didn't Pantanjali say that in the sixth sutra?

At first doing yoga at the gym freaked me out. So loud! So bright! The classes are only an hour!? Mirrors in the studio? I missed the yoga studio sign in, where incense and ohm chatchkes create a kind of overture for class. Now I entered through a subway-esque turnstile whose electronic ID tracker raises paranoiac feeling about governments and RFIDs if I let it. But I found that actually, I wasn't letting it. That I was becoming my own source of calm, not depending so much on the lighting and soundtrack.

And what a soundtrack! Instead of the hushed sounds of post shavasana yogis blended with harmonium and waterfall, I am welcomed by POUNDING DANCE MUSIC. So loud I can barely hear myself think. Hey wait, isn't that a lot like ujai breathe?

Beyond the turnstile at World, a bank of a dozen TV's hang from the ceiling, blaring "Terror! Gossip! Financial Ruin!" I remind myself that Ganesh is not only the remover of obstacles, but also the placer of them. And that obstacles create opportunities. And that these dozen High-Def fear-based images give me the opportunity to consciously embrace love!

Inside the yoga/bike/step/hip-hop room things change. The lights are low, and the Gayatri Mantra plays. But it never quite disguises the other music. Or the punching bag. On the best days it actually blends harmonically into one. And looking at the guys pumping up on the machines it occurs to me that I am pumping up too. Pumping up my drishti, pumping up my ability to focus on the sitars without letting the thump-thumping freak me out.

One extra bonus: yoga virgins wandering into class. An excellent opportunity to suck new people in. I mean help and give guidance. And then there they are on the Nautilus machines, happy to help me klutz around.

Then one day my teacher pointed out how a particular ansana would be expressed "in the perfect Yoga World"! And his tone of voice implied that this was a world we should accept that we might never enter. And while it was true for me with that pose, it occurred to me that I may have entered some sort of other 'perfect yoga world'.

Because I notice that, maybe thanks to World Gym, I am practicing more yoga in the world. Maybe because I feel like World Gym is so unlikely a spot for yoga that any spot seems like a possible yoga spot to me now. In the car, on stage, in bed. In line at Trader Joes. All excellent places to connect with unbound consciousness.

But I am also always so happy to return to my favorite world-class studio. I am happy to practice. In this world or that. Or both. Always mindful in either world that the other exists, that it's all one world. Thank you gym yoga!

End

Read columns from previous months:
         To See or Not To See

         Let It Go-Go

Have your own
My Other Car is a Yoga Mat
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Express your love of yoga while you drive
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COMEDIAN

"The high priestess
of alternative comedy!"

LA Weekly

Beth is the creator of the ground-breaking alternative comedy show Un-Cabaret. Click here for more info & upcoming dates.



You may have seen her apearances on Politically Incorrect, All Things Considered, Sex and the City, heard her on ABC or NPR.

Beth's comedy... it's bouncy!

TEACHER

"You need Beth Lapides'
Un-Cab Lab!"

LA Weekly


Beth teaches comedy as a tool for personal revelation, collective consciousness and, potentially, world peace.

She has taught at CalArts, Humber College, Brown University and ongoing private seminars and workshops.

Click here for more info.

Beth & Greg's cover story about using free-range comedy to teach yoga is in FitYoga Magazine this month (and most of it applies to any public performance or presentation).
Read it right here:

ENLIGHTEN UP: a dozen ways you can use comedy to teach from your totally authentic voice

by Beth Lapides & Greg Miller

We practice (write, perform, produce) a form of comedy known as "Un-Cabaret" but that we think of as the comedy of love. It's a more conversational, open-minded and open-hearted type of comedy. We also teach it. And what we found was that in order to teach this style of comedy we first had to teach people to get into their most authentic voice. To not "sound like" comedians, but to be themselves.

You can't be truly funny without being yourself. But you can't be truly your Self without being at least a little bit funny. It's like leaving one of the colors out of the rainbow! And the benefits are huge. Laughter connects people, brings us into the moment, raises vibration, activates the third chakra, increases endorphins and is fun! Here are some tips to help you practice this new asana; 'laugh-asana'.

1. OPEN UP. Start by giving yourself permission to be funny. Open up to it. The same way you might open to grace.

2. GIVE LAUGHS. Let go of the idea that you have to make people laugh, or get laughs. Think about letting them laugh instead. Think of giving laughs.

3. USE YOUR REAL VOICE. Everyone's voice has a particular rhythm. In the same way that comedians often have that "stand-up comedy voice", yoga teachers sometimes have to work to stay out of that monotonous "yoga teacher voice".

Record yourself in class. Later, playback softly or at a distance. It's not so much about what you are saying, but about what you "sound like". The tempos and rhythms of your voice.

Use words you love, words you make up, words you grew up with; sciencey, arty, geeky, pop culturey, words you use with your friends. Use your own vernacular. These are the words that keep you in your own rhythm.

What we're talking about is naturalism, but even more so. Super naturalism. Being totally organically wholly yourself, but in an exaggerated way for comic effect. Exaggeration is a key tool in the comedy toolbox. Do you have voices, accents or imitations that you naturally do in life? The nagging mother? The Indian guru? The redneck yogi? Little songs you sing? Do it all. Variety creates dynamics. Dynamics create surprise. Surprise creates funny.

4. USE YOUR BODY. Use physicality for comic effect like doing demos with an exaggerated impression of a common student mistake. Even better, do an impersonation of yourself, which requires self-knowledge, humility, and a willingness to be foolish.

5. USE STORIES. Humans love stories. Tell stories of your own practice, breakthroughs you've had. Stories from your life. Stories from the sacred texts. Ask yourself what is funny about a story in the same way that you ask yourself what it means. You can also think about your asana sequencing as a story. In the timeline of the class, is there a place that clearly calls for comic relief? Maybe a particularly intense sequence where a little light-hearted offering will help students surrender?

6. DON'T PUSH. Trying to force a laugh is over-efforting. Relax and remember that a little goes a long way! It's the lightness you're after.

7. BE IN THE MOMENT. Of course. In fact if you can nail a moment, a mood, that everyone is aware of, there's often a laugh of recognition. And if you can respond authentically to something happening - a cell phone, not enough space, forgetting the name of a pose or doing one side of a pose - say hallelujah Ganesha, because you have just turned the obstacle of an awkward moment into an opportunity for laughter.

8. BE THE STRAIGHT MAN. (Not gender-wise!) Offer set-ups, or questions, and let students get the laugh. Once you open the door it doesn't matter who's the first one through.

9. KNOW YOURSELF. Here's a way to practice svadyaya (self-study) in a different kind of triangle pose. Draw a triangle in your notebook. In one corner write 'yogi'. That includes yoga teacher, student, scholar, whatever.

In the other two corners you're going to write other major aspects of yourself. Maybe you're a parent, surfer or artist. Maybe you're a healer and a control freak. Or a drama queen and a Big Sister. You are (at least!) three-dimensional. In each of those dimensions there are stories or funny references that make you you.

10. WRITE ON. You are the author of your classes. (That's what gives you the authority!) Keep a notebook. Use it to keep track of fleeting thoughts but also to explore recurring ideas and stories in depth.

Think of it as a place to play, to overwrite, to explore what you want to get across in class. What are your thoughts about pain? About flow? About balance? What would you tell that stuck student if you had the perfect words? Go ahead and write out whole classes.

Write down what you said to your friend on the phone that made her laugh. In fact the phone is a great place to hear your real voice. Write things down exactly as you said them. Also note things what sparks laughter for you? What do you think is funny?

11. USE BETH'S PAGE TO STAGE METHOD. A class, or audience, has a certain energy, and will act like poultice and elicit things that a page can't. Your prep work on the page will help you channel that energy. And your classes will fuel what goes into the notebook. You alternate. Page to stage (class). Stage back to page. Writing and teaching out loud use opposite sides of the brain. Alternating them is a powerful creative tool, and a 100% renewable resource!

12. PRACTICE. We think of the sense of humor as the seventh sense and, like any sense, it needs to be cultivated. The seventh sense, like the seventh chakra, is light-filled, subtle and so worth working to open! So be patient with yourself. Being funny is a practice that requires practice.

And remember that Buddha passed his teachings on to the smiling disciple not the serious ones. So enlighten up and have fun out there!


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Read this month's column in LA Yoga Magazine: "To See or Not To See"

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Photo credits:

David Keeps:
Beth Mothership

Gary Leonard:
Beth + Eye-Heart